Hi my little buns, how are you? We’re not bad, especially since next week will be the 400th number of champions of the week, and that fills me with joy. Once is not custom, we thank the friend @Well Named for his assiduous research of unusual news items which earned him the Pulitzer Prize (in any case, he deserves it).
1. He runs the London Marathon dressed as a unicorn and breaks a world record
Topito’s analysis: When he was in his costume, this Breton was so fast that he broke the record, some even say he was flying. But if it is in fact it was two people disguised the same who used this subterfuge to confuse everyone.
2. Paris: A game of ping-pong to find a job, the playful operation of Pole emploi
Topito’s analysis: It’s boring because for people like me who are huge crap at ping-pong, it leaves little chance of getting the job. In general, you really have to stop these job dating and bullshit job interviews where you play sports while you’re just looking for a job.
3. Vendée: he finds himself stuck upside down for 30 minutes trying to raise his water meter
Topito’s analysis: I especially hope that this poor man had not left a tap open, can you imagine the horror? You raise your meter and during this time you see your bill increase while being blocked like an idiot.
4. Brazil: They color a waterfall in blue for a “gender reveal party”, an open investigation
Topito’s analysis: When we say to ourselves that humanity has found its weakest concept, we discover a new feat. The principle of “gender reveal party” is one of those completely stupid inventions and when it also smashes a natural place, it’s a sign that you really have to stop.
5. A fake doctor pretends to be a teacher in the Rhône
Topito’s analysis: So to sum up she made believe that she was a doctor and then a teacher, a nice scam that can make us think that we are going to be entitled to a Stop me if you can French version. But hey, in the Rhône it’s less desirable.
6. Niort: a female firefighter suspended for having filled her swimming pool with a rescue truck in the midst of a drought
Topito’s analysis: It must be said that it’s tempting: we have an empty swimming pool, a truck full of fleet, it’s super hot… Except that if there had been a fire, it would have been a pain for him to have to justify that the tanker truck was empty. because of a swimming pool…
7. Nancy: Locked up in the church, he abuses the wine of mass and commits damage
Topito’s analysis: It would be easy to judge, but imagine being locked up in a church all night, you would probably have hit the hosts and the wine of mass too. It was that or read the bible so good, the choice is quickly made.
8. In the middle of his vines, a winegrower from the Var discovers… a coffin
Topito’s analysis: There are those who find dead hedgehogs, others who find Xavier Dupont de Ligonnès and then there are those who just discover a coffin. Difficult to understand how it happened but it looks like a threatening message.
9. Montpellier: disturbed by the bells, she threatens to burn the church of Les Saint-François
Topito’s analysis: I don’t know if you’ve ever slept near a church but it’s super boring this concept of bells, it’s not to say but it’s been over 100 years that everyone has the time on him, you’ll have to see to stop pissing people off.
I wish you a good weekend and advise you to go for a walk on the side of the dicks of the weekit’s super funny.
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Top 9 dumbest news stories, champions of the week #399